Dr. Emily Heisey, PT, DPT is the founder and Dr. Matt Otteman, DC, is co-owner of KinActive Kids, a globally renowned pediatric intensive clinic that combines physical therapy and chiropractic care to help children reach developmental milestones.
502: Your Kid's Gross Motor Development
Dr. Emily Heisey & Dr. Matt Otteman
Are you worried about your child hitting their milestones? Kids’ gross motor development can be a haze of worry for parents.
Hunter talks to Dr. Emily Heisey and Dr. Matt Otteman about how to help kids, what shoes to wear, how to place your baby and more. You’ll find out what common baby toy is a big "Don’t"!
Ep 502: Your Kid's Gross Motor Development w/ Dr. Emily Heisey and Dr. Matt Otteman
Read the Transcript 🡮
*This is an auto-generated transcript*
[00:00:00] Dr. Matt Otteman: I think some things have changed recently, too, like Emily was saying. Just with, environment, but also social media and parents get into this comparison, where they're looking at Timmy down the street and, they're the same age as maybe their child, and they're doing a little bit more than what the parent thinks they should be doing, and they're looking at their child and saying why aren't they doing this?
[00:00:25] Hunter: You're listening to The Mindful Parenting Podcast, episode number 502. Today, we're talking about your child's gross motor development with Dr. Emily Heisey and Dr. Matt Otteman.
Welcome to the Mindful Parenting podcast. Here, it's about becoming a less irritable, more joyful parent. At Mindful Parenting, we know that you cannot give what you do not have, and when you have calm and peace within, then you can give it to your children. I'm your host, Hunter Clarke-Fields. I help smart, thoughtful parents stay calm so they can have strong, connected relationships with their children. I've been practicing mindfulness for over 25 years, I'm the creator of the Mindful Parenting course, and I'm the author of the international bestseller Raising Good Humans and now Raising Good Humans Every Day, 50 Simple Ways to Press Pause, Stay Present, and Connect with Your Kids.
I want to say hello like the way that Mr. T said hello, do you remember? This really ages me to say that. It was like a cartoon on Saturday morning. Whatever. Hello, welcome back to the Mindful Parenting podcast. So glad you are here. If you get something out of this podcast, please do tell a friend about it. Do Take one tiny action to support the podcast, and that really helps enormously in the great big algorithm of, the word of mouth is really powerful. Please do that thing, and thank you, if when you do. And hey, welcome if you're new! I'm so glad you're here. I'm not normally this dorky, but whatever. Sometimes I am. That's fine.
In just a moment, I'm going to be sitting down with Dr. Emily Heisey founder of Connective Kids, and Dr. Matt Otteman, Co-owner of KinActive Kids, a globally renowned pediatric intensive clinic that combines physical therapy and chiropractic care to help children reach developmental milestones. And we will be talking about this idea of your kids milestones and their physical development. Kids gross motor development can be this kind of haze of worry for parents. So we're going to talk to Dr. Emily and Dr. Matt about how to help kids what shoes to wear, how to hold, how to place your baby, so much more. You'll find out what common baby toy is also a big don't. So this is a great episode if you have babies and little kids. So I think you'll get so much out of it. You're going to hear about. The guilt, the shame that we feel, and also, things like why your kid isn't working yet. Join me at the table as I talk to Dr. Emily and Dr. Matt.
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Matt, Emily, thank you so much for coming on the Mindful Parenting podcast.
[00:05:09] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, thanks for having us. Thanks so much for having us.
[00:05:11] Hunter: Yeah, I'm interested to talk to you. We've had we had someone talking about pediatric development before kids development, and I learned some alarming things the last time I talked to someone about pediatric development where There are kids, there were kids like falling out of their seats at school because they don't have balance because they're not doing some things. What are you seeing as far as what's happening for kids as far as their physical development and what are you seeing come into your offices?
[00:05:42] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, I think so I'm a pediatric physical therapist and I've been treating for about Almost 15 years. And what's come through our doors over the past, however long, especially, let's say we had been connective kids for about, since 2020 has definitely changed over the years. I would say when Matt joined me he's a chiropractor and we joined forces. We started to, especially after COVID, see that either it was because parents were around their kids more. Maybe we're noticing things that weren't happening in those first 12 to 18 months crawling, walking, sitting, or maybe they were doing things a little bit differently. So you definitely had more of the anxious parent coming in to the office. Asking about, is this typical? Why is my child not doing it? So there was definitely an influx of different kiddos that came in at that point and now we really cater to people. All kinds of kiddos, kiddos that may just need a little jumpstart. Meaning that they aren't crawling or walking and they just need a couple of little, tricks and tips to get them moving to all the way to the other end, neuroatypical kiddos, and maybe have cerebral palsy, spina bifida, Down syndrome that need a lot more help. So we cater all types of kiddos. They're all stages of development.
[00:07:01] Hunter: You were looking at all these different kids and I'm not hearing the alarming news now that I was hearing before. This is good. I can't.
[00:07:09] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah no. I, development has always been typically the same, like our bodies and how it develops has never changed. What changes is our environment and where you may see a influx of kiddos needing some assistance is one of them, for instance, was the tummy time campaign with SIDS and how placing your child on their belly all the time instead of placing them on their back or. on their side or holding them vertically, putting them in one position all the time can create delays. Anything in excess, especially with personal development is a bad thing. Parents got so scared about not putting their children on their back. We did want flat headed babies, so remember that, yeah. Yes, right? But, what's interesting is that development happens on your back, okay? That's how we learn how to track an object from side to side.
It's how we learn how to tuck our chin in or to swallow. Development happens in the side lying position. That's how our ribs move. Round out. So we had this big, beautiful breast support and that we can, that can help us have the cardiovascular endurance to run and jump and play vertical play, sitting upright or being held upright, that helps too, with again, rounding out that spine and getting that erect posture and just being able to navigate and our environment. So everything's helpful. So I guess maybe that could be the alarming one. But I think knowledge is power. And we're at a point now where parents are really seeking out this knowledge. And so they feel empowered with their children. So they don't get to the point where they're like, Oh my goodness, an alarm. This is terrible. What's happening?
[00:08:50] Hunter: Okay. So I'm hearing like, we want to have, I love this cause it's the middle path of physical development for kids is we want to have all kinds of situations that our kids are physically in, not just one situation a lot, We want to be in a lot of different sort of physical situations, vertically, tummy, back, all kinds of different things happening.
[00:09:15] Dr. Matt Otteman: I think some things have changed recently too. Emily was saying, just with, environment, but also social media and parents get into this comparison. Where they're looking at Timmy down the street and, they're the same age as maybe their child and they're doing a little bit more than what, textbook they, what the parent thinks they should be doing. And they're looking at their child and saying why aren't they doing this? There's a great Bluey episode about this. And it's so good. It's called A Baby Race. And it's really great. And that's something our. And they touched on our models a little bit different, but one thing that's very important to us is empowering parents through education.
Because comparison is the thief of joy, right? That's where we're losing some of this sight of what's now, and we're looking at what everybody else has or whatever else is doing. And so we can educate them and empower them to take control of there are things that I can do to help my child develop, or, maybe I don't need to stress about that because crawling doesn't happen until, I have a six month old, they're really, they're not really crawling yet. That's okay.
[00:10:18] Hunter: Yeah. And when my, I'm very much steeped in the Montessori education system and my daughters were brought up in that. And I, we have a school that's a charter school that we helped develop with that. And what I love about that they have this idea of this sensitive periods for kids. And that this acknowledgement that they're all different, that all kids are different. Like you may have kids in a wide range of ages that are having a sensitive period in their development for whatever reason, for reading or for, for fine motor skills or for whatever. And I imagine it's much the same way with all these bigger milestones is that there's a lot of I don't know. Imagine there's a huge range of things. Things, a range of times in which things happen. My daughter, who could climb a ladder before she could walk. So there's all kinds of different things that can happen, right? I was like, Oh my God, my baby is climbing up that ladder. She's can't walk yet. Okay, this is happening.
[00:11:27] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, I think it's important. The big gross motor milestones really. happen over those first two years of life specifically the first 12 to 15 months. And it's good for parents, yes, to know that there is a range. I always say there's a sliding scale of when gross motor milestones should be achieved.
You can give or take one or two months. For instance being able to roll from tummy to back. That typically occurs around four months, but could happen anywhere from four to six months. So just giving a range, knowing that there is, a time frame where things should happen allows a parent to be like, okay, this isn't happening. I need to be on the lookout, but also giving grace, knowing that, again, yeah, you're going to have this sliding scale of when a child achieves. And the higher level skills like crawling and walking, you have even more time. That may start at emerge crawling on hands and knees at eight months. It may not be achieved until 12 months and walking is the same way. They may not achieve it until 15, 16 months. But the cool thing is God gave us grace in this time period to where from 12 to 24 months, there really isn't a lot of gross motor skills that need to be happening or occurring, so it's a catch up time. So it's really nice that, we have those first two years of development. Yes, there are some ranges in there, but also it's padded by that additional year after 12 months to where we can all catch up.
[00:13:07] Hunter: Stay tuned for more Mindful Mama podcasts right after this break.
Okay, so if your child is Not crawling and they're a year old. If your child is not walking and they're 14 months old, don't panic. There's time.
[00:15:23] Dr. Matt Otteman: There's time. Yeah. Like she was saying, it's not like a definitive timeframe. We always look at is the child, they're not going to do it perfectly. So maybe they're 12 months and they're starting to try and take their first steps. That's good. 14 months trying to take their first steps. That's good. But they're not going to be doing it perfect. So don't worry about it.
The first time they do it, looking exactly the way that it should be. What you'll, what we typically want to see is are they trying to do the skills within that timeframe? So at four months. Rolling tummy to back. If they're not able to push through their arms, which is the first thing that they need to have in order to roll from tummy to back, if they're not really pushed through their elbows, pushing through their arms, then you might need to, dig a little bit deeper into why is that happening? And that's where maybe seeking help, making sure that the timeline is accurate that you have in your head, because a lot of parents, they actually don't know the exact dates or ranges that things are supposed to happen. So make sure that, okay, this is within the right time range. They're doing something that I think they're not doing something that should be happening right now. They're not trying to do that. And then, okay, do I need to do something about it? And I think what, one thing that we really talk a lot about is interacting with them and purposeful play. Or proactive play. What are the things that you can do at home? We talk a lot about this in our connective community, but what are things that you can do at home to specifically help their gross motor development? Because it can be like playtime. It can be fun. It can be easy. You probably already know you're, you probably are already doing it without noticing it, and then you can do things specifically to help them achieve those skills.
[00:17:00] Hunter: So what, tell us then about purposeful play, I like, I really like un-purposeful play for kids are, can be very free to do what they want, but I imagine purposeful play has its place too, so tell me about what that is.
[00:17:14] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, so purposeful play is really tailoring your child's playtime into ways that's going to foster social, cognitive, physical development, but in ways that seem fun. So really the terminology purposeful play may be more so for the parent than it is for the kid because you really are allowing them to play, but you're directing a little bit of that play to have a purpose and to help with the next skill.
So let me give you an example. For instance, a child who is learning how to sit and now it's emerging. They're around the five to six month time. Putting them, sitting them in front of you with their feet hanging off the table and just having them visually look at you, that is allowing their pelvis to shift forward. They're getting great eye contact. So it's helping with their head control. They're feeling that connection with you and they're building trunk musculature at the same time. Or the kiddo, they're like, this is great, I'm playing mom. To the parent, they also might be thinking, I'm just sitting my kid on the edge of the table. But really, it's allowing them to gain the necessary strength in order to go to that next level. So it's very simple little things that you can do and like with Tommy time, even instead of just laying them on the floor, popping them up on their elbows to where their shoulders are higher than their hips, that's going to help with rolling. Again, they're just small little things that you can do. I always say 20 minutes a day because parents always feel like, or I did as a parent myself, that I had to be doing something all the time and that if I just let them do their own thing, so I'm probably a little opposite of you in that I always felt like I had to be doing. This is a way to calm the nerves and anxieties of the parents. Like 20 minutes of just really engaging and then letting them do the rest of the stuff on their own. It's all you need.
[00:19:09] Hunter: Yeah, that sounds really doable and natural. Five minutes here, five minutes there of, okay, let's like make sure all the parts are working. Yeah. And just check that all the muscles are good and see how they're doing on these different things. That sounds really reasonable and easy to do. Sure. What, how could for for a toddler who's starting to walk? run and things like that. What are some things you might do in that age?
[00:19:37] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, really just getting them to feel the floor engage those intrinsic muscles of the feet. So getting them to stand, whether it's supported or not and balance on different surfaces, sand, grass maybe even having them holding your hand, standing on a couch cushion or a pillow to where it's slushy having them go on soft surfaces like tile. But again, They're getting that proprioceptive input, that tactile input through their feet, registering up all the way to their brain. Hey, my body is balancing. I'm standing. And it just allows them to not only build strength, but be comfortable. Navigating their surroundings. So it's an easy thing that you can do and that would be purposeful.
And I like tricking them in a sense where, at first, when they're first starting to learn how to walk, they want to hold on to mom or dad's hand. That's a blanket of comfort for them that they need to eventually let go of in order to take independent steps. So what you can do is build a little bit of space between, have them hold on to a stick or something, a toy spinning toy or something that they like to play with, have them hold on to it. You hold on to the other end. They feel the support from mom or dad, they're right there, but there's that one level of separation from the child and the parents, and they start to build that confidence to do it on their own.
[00:20:55] Hunter: All right. Cool. And I imagine things like, rough and tumble play and things like that as we're getting older. This is like great stuff for developing strength, developing balance. All of those things, connecting, bonding, that kind of stuff.
[00:21:11] Dr. Emily Heisey: Oh, sure. Yeah. We learned so much just through cause and effect. Every time we fall is a registering to our brain. Oh I'm not going to do that the next time. And so again, falls are great, especially with higher level balance skills. Cause it builds that barrier of caution, which some kiddos are, most kiddos don't have, right? When they start walking, that's why they are just like rams going into everything. So that cosmetic side, so don't, don't feel scared when your kiddos are falling.
[00:21:40] Hunter: Yeah, my neighbor across the street from me is one year old now, and she is, we're outside with the dogs, and she's walking all around. And it's so funny, she falls, and it's just my daughters are like, oh, they're teenagers, they're just like, oh, it's just oh, okay it's not that far that she's falling, it's like very short distance, it's not such a big deal. She's got a diaper on: extra padding, lots of padding.
We want that for kids. You were talking about balance and you're talking about balancing on different surfaces. And actually my neighbor across the street, they are, she, they're starting, she's starting to walk outside. So they're starting to give her shoes. And you have some very strong opinions about shoes that I noticed on your Instagram page. That I recommended to my neighbor. I was like, when my daughters were little, we had these great shoes. They were like, these like soft, they had just there were like little moccasins with leather on the bottom. Robies, if you're still in business, here's a free shout out for you: sponsor the podcast! But you have a, you really don't recommend shoes by someone called Two Tiny Feet. Tell me about shoes and why they should not wear these shoes.
[00:22:51] Dr. Emily Heisey: There's a kind of a wide range of shoes that all encompass the same type of characteristics.
So let me give you the rundown real quick on shoes. Okay. First and foremost, barefoot is best when a kiddo is learning how to walk, okay? Because we want them to scrunch those little toes again, turn on those intrinsic ankle muscles, feel the floor. But as we get older, up until that two to three year old range, where now we're having to go to preschool or go to the grocery store. And now we're upright, it's gross to not wear any type of shoes. So there are a couple characteristics of a good shoe that I like to say all parents prefer shoes can go with. The main things are, one, you want a shoe with tread on the bottom because they are already prone to falling.
So you want something that's going to have some treads where they go on different surfaces, they're not going to flip and fall. So that's number one. You want a shoe that is flexible, meaning you can fold and bend and mold it. But if that shoe completely collapses in half, specifically on the heel cup, So I'll take my thumb and place it on the back of the shoe and push my thumb down. If my thumb is able to completely collapse down and there is nothing in the back of the shoe supporting the heel, then that's not going to be a good shoe because our heel is going to help the rest of our foot balance. So if we don't have support there, they're going to be more wobbly. Again, you're just making it harder for them to walk if they have a shoe on there that's not doing them any favors.
Having a shoe that has a Velcro closure is going to help that heel stay back in the shoe. And then having a wide toe box, a shoe that right where the little toes are is wide enough to where they can scratch those little toes. Because again, a child's foot is a little bit different than ours. They sweat two times more than us. And so looking at the material. How long they're wearing the shoe, all those kind of things go into it. But you just want to set them up for success and have a little structure when we're picking out shoes. Fun fact the feet the bones in the feet don't start to really grow together until about three years old and then they don't stop and they don't completely come together and solidify, ossify, until really seven to even up to 14. So anything we put on external on that foot is going to shape the foot for the rest of our lives. So putting a shoe on like a croc or a native or a flip flop. is not going to allow those bones to really come together in this really nice way. You want a shoe that has a little bit of structure that allows for those muscles to fire instead of, again, some of these shoes that maybe just slip on and allows their foot to move all around, creates blisters. That's where some of those shoes that don't have much support really put children at a disadvantage because it excels in those falls.
[00:25:52] Dr. Matt Otteman: One of the easiest things a parent can do to help with their child if they are having any walking delays is assess what their ankles are doing and give them a supportive base with a shoe.
That should be the first thing that you're looking at if you're, getting, you They're not taking the steps, look at their foot, give them a supportive shoe, because that's something that you can help with. Now, as a chiropractor, I typically lean towards the more holistic side, barefoot, right? I get all of that, but we have to, when looking at the biomechanics of the human body, we have to be able to strengthen the hips, strengthen the proximal muscles. And if there's too much movement in the ankles or the foot at an early age, they're not going to be able to properly strengthen the muscles closest to it. Think of learning to walk while you're, on sand. It's going to be really hard. You're going to have to work extra hard to figure out where your balance is. You can support their ankle so that they can strengthen the muscles in the hip and then take the shoes away where, and then they can build the intrinsic muscles within the feet. But they have to have that proximal stability first before you can get distal mobility.
[00:26:57] Hunter: Oh, my God. Yeah. You guys are finding this so crazy. My grandmother, when she was like four years old, came to the United States. She was born in 1908. And so it was very early. And on the boat, she traded shoes with some other kid who was also coming over. But my mom still has these shoes and got them sent to her recently. And so there's these like four year old shoes from like the 1910s.And they are, like super hard, stiff, thick leather. They're pointy with a square toe box, but pointy. And they have iron railings on the bottom of a wooden shoe bottom with a heel like a horseshoe. It's crazy they're insane kid's shoes. That's a little bit too much structure right there.
[00:27:46] Dr. Matt Otteman: We've come a long way. We have. We've come a long way since then.
[00:27:50] Hunter: Okay what else can parents do to help their kids develop in those early years? What are, what else can they do to just help them make sure their bodies are healthy and strong and they're doing all the things that they can?
[00:28:02] Dr. Matt Otteman: I'd say the first thing that a parent can do is go back and one, just take a breath because there's a statistic out there that says 70 percent of parents when their child isn't meeting a milestone, that they feel that it's a direct relation to their parenting skills. And that's something that I feel is something that we're trying to change because again, we want to empower through education. So the first thing that they can do is go and look at, try and gain some information about what exactly is supposed to happen. And then simple things like purposeful play, try and learn some of the things that they can do in the comfort of their own living room between changes that can help with development, physical development, cognitive development. And it, it really feels like playtime. It's open space for the child, like Emily was saying earlier, but it's a little bit more structured for the parent. And that's, I think, the first step. Emily, do you have anything?
[00:28:56] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah I was a very anxious mother. Would you think, as being, like, a pediatric PT and then having young toddlers my girls are only 19 months apart. And so I, I don't know why, but I just was going to all these different play places, putting them in all these activities. It just was very anxiety inducing for me. So I really got into the habit, and this is what a lot of parents can do, is it doesn't have to be fancy. Go outside. Go outside and Things such as giving them a sponge and letting them wash their little tripe's car or stuff like that are, these are things that are in your backyard already. You're just putting a little creative spin on it. Getting some, Cool Whip or shaving cream and letting them paint with their toes or their fingertips. Getting them on their hands and knees. They're doing these gross motor movements. They're reaching up. They're building upper extremity strength. They're building endurance. They're playing. They're getting all this tactile stimulation. And that could take an hour or so, and then they're ready for a nap. And so are you, but it doesn't have to be this fancy activity. Some of my favorite activities are just whiz. water in a sponge. Just getting outside and just playing with everyday household things.
[00:30:16] Hunter: Stay tuned for more Mindful Mama podcast right after this break.
To me, it sounds like, the challenge is in unless you have some real delays that you're looking at with your kid. I said challenges is managing your own feelings and expectations and like getting out of the way and just getting the kids in a place yeah, like outside, like out in the woods, down by the creek or just like around the house, helping out, really letting them do the things that we would naturally do with kids and just getting your own anxiety out of the way.
[00:32:43] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, absolutely. That's a big one. Getting our own anxiety out of the way. Thinking, instead of doing so much, just let it be. Development will happen.
[00:32:51] Hunter: Okay, so let's talk about a couple of items that we really like. So we talked about shoes. What do you think about baby carriers, baby wearers versus strollers? Both? Thumbs up? Any thumbs down? Any you particularly recommend?
[00:33:07] Dr. Emily Heisey: My youngest, or sorry, my oldest had colic and I literally cried every day until she was like nine months, nine months old. I was a huge proponent of baby wearing. I did let's see, the ergo baby. Oh, I loved my ergo so much. Yes, and there's a couple different I have on my Instagram @kinactive_kids actually have a review of different baby wearing carriers. So when it comes to that, I just say, whatever you got to do, you do mom. Okay. Because it's hard and to say and put to put added pressure on a parent like don't use that this much don't like we all know we have a kind of barometer of okay. If my child's been in this for four hours that maybe But I don't mind, I think strollers again, there's a lot of different types whatever is convenient to the parent.
I like my Britex one there's several different brands. There's that Doola, what is the one that your wife has, Matt, the one that just catches in the car? I would say, but if there, when it comes to all types, let's generalize it, all types of baby equipment the only one as a pediatric PT that I would say no, maybe let's find an alternative to would be a baby jumper. They're coming up and they're jumping, okay and the reason being, and that's my only hard no and I can give you some alternatives, but because a child, their hips really don't start to develop and into their pelvis until about 18 months. So if you are, and they don't start jumping, really truly jumping until 24 to 26 months. So putting a child in something that has a direct force from their feet all the way up into their hips around the 6, 7, 8, 9 month mark, is really putting them at risk for hip dislocation and a lot of other damaging things that could happen. Because jumping shouldn't occur until later on. And that's when our body and the force can the force at the floor and those hits can handle it. So that's my only thing. Everything else is good.
[00:35:22] Dr. Matt Otteman: Yeah. All right. I think containers are great. Like what Emily said, but also mixing it up. So like she touched on as long as, just to, anything in excess can be a bad thing. So make sure that you're, do what you need to do, wear them. Okay. Put him in a stroller for a little bit. We've, they've been, like, we get home and we're trying to cook dinner and he's fine, content, just sitting in the car seat, like he's going to stay in the car seat until we can fix dinner for our other two kittens. Yeah. But then at the same time, we're going to take him out or be mindful he's going to have floor time because we want to rotate the positions that they're in. So they're not always in laying on their back. They're not always on their stomach. There's four different positions. There's back, tummy, sideline, and vertical. You should be getting a little bit of each of those. Now, if they're only in containers, they're going to get a lot of vertical, but not so much of the other ones. So you need to mix in some of those other positions.
[00:36:12] Hunter: Okay, what about Balance Bikes? This was like a favorite, like my favorite thing ever. I want to just know that it's been, it's anointed by you guys.
[00:36:24] Dr. Emily Heisey: I think it it goes, it's really dependent on the kiddo. So I have actually reviewed different types of Balance Bikes. I know there's like a Strider. And there's different ones, and I have also reviewed that on my Instagram page. I think they're great. I think some kiddos, it made a lot of sense, too. My oldest loved it. Okay, it really helped her find her center of gravity and understand how she needs to balance and use her core in order to propel a bike. My youngest, she's a toad. And so she was like, I don't want to do that. I don't want to use a balance bike. And so for her, she just went straight to trying to learn on a bike. I would say it's based on the kiddo. There isn't a reason that it's bad or good. I think it's just a nice tool that's out there that can help a kiddo kind of find their center of gravity and balance.
[00:37:16] Hunter: And kids should be doing things like like spinning around, doing things like spinning around, climbing, risky play, all that kind of stuff, right? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Go ahead. And that's part of just being in different positions, right? Getting them tactile with their hands, getting them in the dirt, get dirty. Like again, get outside, go start to try and climb a tree, throw a ball kick a ball, right? All of those different things. They're all senses that your body has to integrate. And the faster that we can do that. And I think the more that we can do that with outdoor, non screens, things like that, I think the better for development. Movement is key. Yeah. And I always thought with the thing about climbing a tree or something like that is that if I can get my child to check in with her body, like you talked about proprioception a couple of times here, right? That sense of where my body is in space, what does it feel like inside my body, then they're gonna be safer than any kind of arbitrary rules placing over them.
[00:38:22] Dr. Emily Heisey: Oh, 100%. My girls, when they're at the playground, again, I don't, I am a little bit anxious. And they are climbing on everything and they're standing on top of the monkey bars and they're swinging their legs. And I'm like, my husband's watching and he's yeah, they're good. And I'm like, how are they that strong and how they do it? Because they practice it and they've been doing it. So they know what, if they're about to fall, they know if they needed to grip a little bit more. So yeah, a lot of a child learning the parameters of what's safe and not safe and. How to, play is by doing and that's where they gain the strength. So yeah, it really is just finding how they can hone in on that proprioceptive input and figure out where their muscles are contracting and how to balance and how to grip and all the things, but they have to do that through movement.
[00:39:14] Dr. Matt Otteman: I think one of the, one of the best things today obviously is they, at playgrounds, they have, safe areas where if they do fall, they're safe and they're not going to hurt themselves. But, and this is dating myself a little bit, but I can You know, back in when I was a kid, like there was concrete that we were swinging on bars from, and I learned real fast, like what positions were bad positions for me to be in. And I learned cause and effect real fast. And I think that the more that they can do that, integrate it with their bodies of what positions are good positions, what positions are bad positions, and then strength, they're going to build the strength in their hands and their movements. That's what's really important.
[00:39:51] Hunter: Yeah, and I think that, that is just so exciting to see, like I don't know, just seeing them on the monkey bars, seeing them do things that go, you crazy little five year old doing pull ups I can't do that, that's amazing Emily, you said that, you said you're an anxious parent how have you, or are you, how are you working with your anxiety to allow your kids to do that kind of play?
[00:40:20] Dr. Emily Heisey: Honestly, I think stepping back and instead of doing watching because I feel like when I try to intervene and be like, oh, maybe try this or try that or don't do that. And that's when there's more problems. So if, and this is really with my patients too, stepping back and watching the capabilities of a child can really astonish you. And just by seeing them being successful has really calmed me down. Also my husband being like, you need to just let them do it. And I'll be like, oh, okay. Yeah, you have a voice you can trust there. Yes, but kids are capable of so much more than we think they are. And they are scrappy, they are tenacious, and given the ability to try new things and learn them, Most of the time they will succeed. It's us as we get older, where we see that we have limitations or maybe our body is now having limitations. I'm approaching 40. I've got limitations. I'm not as agile as I was at, 16, but again, they don't really have that. They are still growing and developing. And everything they don't have joints that are popping and all these things. They are innately ready to move and let them do it. Just stepping away and watching, that's been the best thing for me.
[00:41:39] Hunter: Yeah, I'm hearing this message of empowerment, right? And that's what I've heard a lot over the years is like, when they have that me do it phase yes, empower them to do it or just say, okay, give it a try or whatever it is, whether it's like climbing, if you're able to spot them climbing the thing they want to climb, or if you're able to guide them in cutting the vegetable or washing the dish or whatever it is, just rather than use those limitations sparingly. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, for sure. 100%. Awesome. This has been awesome. It's great to check in with you. I think that Emily and Matt have these, have great resources for you, dear listener. If you are curious about things, all things pediatric development You can check out their Instagram page, @kinactive_kids, and you can find them. Is there anything that is there anything that we missed for the parents who are, worried about kids development or what they should or shouldn't be doing?
[00:42:41] Dr. Emily Heisey: Yeah, so we have a ton of resources free resources on our, Instagram page, but our website, which is just KinactiveKids.com. Right when you get on, you're going to see a pop up of a gross motor checklist, and that starts all the way from birth to five years old. So if you're wondering what should my kid be doing? What kind of things should I be helping to promote in their daily life? That's a great tool to have. We're just trying to change the way the world treats their children. So we're going to lead by example and then educate others in how to do that too.
[00:43:15] Hunter: Yeah. Let's empower the kids to do all the things they can do. I love that. Thank you, Emily. Thank you, Matt, for coming on. I appreciate your time and sharing things with us.
Thank you so much. Absolutely. Thanks for having us.
Yeah. Thank you so much for having us.
[00:43:37] Hunter: Hey, I hope you enjoyed this episode. Yeah, I was like, Oh no, I used a bouncy thing. Didn't know about the hips. Hope my girl's hips are okay. So much to worry about, but I think that was like one of the big messages that we just want to. Let go of some of the worry too as well. Anyway, I hope this episode helped you understand and maybe relieve some of that pressure and worry.
That's what I'm hoping for you. That's what I hope. And if you have friends with littles or family members with littles, share this episode with them. Tell them to subscribe. And we'll be back with so much more. We cover the gamut here, all over the map. And yeah. Thank you. Thank you for the feedback. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for Apple podcast reviews. Those really make a difference. So thank you for all that. And I'm wishing you all the best. I hope you have lots of like giggles and snuggles this week. And maybe if your kid isn't a giggly or snuggly kid, maybe just get like a great hug or maybe you just get some time for yourself. That might be the thing that fills up your cup this week. I know we need that. It's super, super important. Okay, that's all I got for you today. Wishing you all the best and I'll be back again next week. Namaste.
[00:45:06] Mindful Mama Member: I'd say definitely do it. It's really helpful. It will change your relationship with your kids for the better. It will help you communicate better and just I'd say communicate better as a person, as a wife, as a spouse. It's been really a positive influence in our lives. So definitely do it. I'd say definitely do it. It's so worth it. The money really is incredible. It's so consequential when you get so much benefit from being a better parent to your children and feeling like you're connecting more with them and not feeling like you're yelling all the time or you're like, why isn't this working? I would say definitely do it. It's so worth it. It'll change you.
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[00:46:09] Hunter: Are you frustrated by parenting? Do you listen to the experts and try all the tips and strategies, but you're just not seeing the results that you want? Or are you lost as to where to start? Does it all seem so overwhelming with too much to learn? Are you yearning for community people who get it, who also don't want to threaten and punish to create cooperation?
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