How 2 Parents Calmed Shouting 7-Year Old

I’ve been thrilled to work with many couples inside Mindful Parenting, and I’ll share the story of one mom and dad. Nyla, mom, describes herself as loving, willing to learn and change. Jacob, dad, is loving, fun, silly, and adventurous. Both of them are dedicated to their kids and to changing generational patterns. They don’t want to raise their kids the way their own parents raised them, but they were struggling when they joined Mindful Parenting three months ago.

They have three kids: 10 year-old Jeri who is adventurous, persistent, and self motivated. 7 year-old Dell is silly, brave, and strong-willed. And 4 year-old Shaylyn is playful, and adventurous.

They joined because 7 year-old Dell’s behavior was escalating really quickly constantly and sometimes getting physical. Nyla and Jacob were at a loss as to what to do about it.

Yet it didn’t take long for them to turn this around. About a month into their membership, when I met with them for their private session (included for every member) they’d used the tools of Mindful Parenting to radically change things.

They shared that Dell’s behavior was calming down and no longer escalating—a huge win! 👏 Parents Jacob and Nyla had been working through the module on Reflective Listening and putting what they’d learned into practice. Dell told them herself that she feels like they are listening to her more and that she feels more connected—wow! They are all working together now to come up with solutions.

Yet of course not every problem was solved, there was more to work on.

We spent the session talking about how to hold boundaries consistently and the different parenting styles between Jacob and Nyla. I helped them see when to step out of interfering with their kids' arguments and how to back out of the role of judge and jury.

After that, both Nyla and Jacob often came to the group coaching sessions we offer each week. I celebrate their wins with them and help them with the challenges. I’ve been honored to get to know them well and I get to check in on the dynamic between the three kids. Recently they were on a call together (from separate places) along with another parent-couple who were on from separate locations too! They love having the weekly calls to hone in on issues and tools to fall back on when they’re stuck.

This community is life-affirming for me. To see parents share openly each week—celebrating each other’s wins and commiserating with each other’s challenges. They truly know that they are not alone. We do this powerful work of changing generational patterns together and it makes me incredibly hopeful for the future. 

Are you curious about Mindful Parenting? I open the doors just a few times a year, so go here to learn more and get on the waitlist.